The Fixtures for the 2024 ICC Men’s T20 World Cup have been released. And there is great news for the Patels of New Jersey, USA. Team India will play all their group matches in New York. Since most Indians have an aunt and uncle who live in the United States of America, they know at least one city in the US, and that’s New York City. However, most of us have been lied to, as all the desis who tell their families back in India about living in New York City, actually live in New Jersey, across the pond.
Television viewers in India will be disappointed when they watch this highly anticipated cricket world cup match between India and Pakistan. Since they won’t be able to see the Empire State Building, World Trade One, Statue of Liberty or any of Manhattan’s skyline during the game. The match will be played at Eisenhower ground in New York state which is is a 1 hour drive from New York City. It’s even worse for our desis as for them, it’ll be a 2-3 hour long trip from New Jersey.
NRIs are further disappointed because a quick google maps aerial image search will show us that there is literally no stadium or ground at the Eisenhower Park in New York. The apparent construction of this ground was put on hold because Joe Biden and his corrupt democratic government diverted the funds to house illegal refugees in hotel rooms while displacing thousands of tax paying American citizens on the streets of New York City and California. Hence, hotel accomodations are also expensive for travelers hoping to catch a glimpse of Rohit Sharma, Virat Kohli, Hard Dick Pandya and Mohammad Shami.
The Taxi Union of New York City is bracing themselves for this impending crisis in June. Most Taxi drivers and Uber drivers in New York are also South Asians from India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Afghanistan and Sri Lanka. Naturally most of these fellers will flock to Eisenhower Park to watch the The T20 World Cup leaving Americans hapless since the public transportation in New York is already a shithole with homeless drug addicted maniacs running rampant and the smell of piss and marijuana overwhelming our senses. At least we get to see Keanu Reaves there once in a while.
We hope the third world country of USA and it’s poverty ridden cricket board is able to provide adequate facilities our superstar Indian players. Inshallah bwoys will play weall.
Cameraman Kamil Yusuf Ke Saath, Chandnawab, Indus news, Karachi.
ROWDY CRIKET 